Thursday, November 17, 2005

Mid-Winter '03-'04

I couldn't sleep. Sitting at my desk I stared into a black lamp above a pile of paper, one stick of Burt's Bees Wax, and earplugs across the computer desk from 103 cents I ment to exchange with a crips bill. I couldn't help but think of earlier that day.

I heard a friend proclaim facetiously, "having fun is so much fun!"
I ached for a more serious sense of humor...

My computer screen turned off. The screen saver (as it still does today), read "Insert text here." I'd never told anyone that I had changed it back to this after a friend had once done just that.
"I love ERK."
It remained until three and a half hours after she left for New Jersey on a sunday morning. She never saw my computer, or my screen saver again.

The stereo let out a click, and at that moment I realized the coffee I drank at 9 PM must have kept me up. It was a depressing thought... The feeling that I had did not come from anything meaningful; not from my eerily lonely walk home alone in the middle of the normally busy main street of Syracuse, not from the start of the winter or the snow itself, not even from the 6 minutes I stood still in the middle of the intersection closest to my dorm watching the lights change, uninterrupted by automobiles.

I became tired and remembered about a calculus exam the next day, and my ill preparation for it. The emptiness I felt was quickly replaced with fiery frustration.

I counted the hours I'd be able to sleep...
"Not good... for getting over a cold..."

2 Comments:

Blogger Ezra said...

if i heard someone say "having fun is so much fun", i would be like "dued u r on some next-level shit". that's the kind of statement that could go either way. the person either has a retarded sense of humor or a sense of humor so awesome it blows your mind.

7:54 PM  
Blogger wes miles said...

For sure,
In fact, it was John who said that, I've since learned to appreciate it, and that, in general John is certainly on the next level, in many ways, especially musicly, and sense of humor-wise... both of which have blown my mind on other days... back then it hit me like a paint-ball on the back of the head, and I wasn't sure what to think, but in retrospect, it fits in with his sun-beamy, very silly, rainbowish, ridiculous (but still hilarious) style/sense of humor.

You should hear the sound track he made for kyle/stone's movie last year, especially the piano track. Maybe I'll make a myspace page for him after he finishes mixing my song.

12:51 PM  

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